it hurts.

i had to tell you.
despite how bad it was, i had to.
now that ive told you, you probably don't want to talk to me for a long time.
i don't understand, why does this always happen to me, i don't want it, i never ask for these problems. and yet, it happens.

i love you.
i always will.
why do others have to try and stop this, interfering with me.
confusing me.
messing up my head.
i dont understand anymore.

or maybe, i just dont want to understand.
today was meant to be a good day for you and for me, but i ruined it.
i always end up ruining things
and i don't even know how.